Editor’s note: Welcome to The Fug Report! Each week our fashion blogger friends Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan, the sartorial geniuses behind Go Fug Yourself, will feature some of their favorite looks of the week in this space. We hope you enjoy it!

This week on Go Fug Yourself, we took a walk down memory lane to revisit the past and current hotness of Ralph Fiennes. We wondered what was up with Robert Pattinson’s new, weird, haircut. We gazed longingly (?) at Robert Downey, Jr. — even if he is wearing something that looks like a test pattern. We checked in with Jennifer Aniston, and found her wearing seriously weird shoes. We talked about Christina Hendricks’ boobs (what else?) on the cover of Lucky. And, finally, we put J. Lo to work — look, she’s going through a divorce. She needs to keep busy.

Editor’s note: Welcome to The Fug Report! Each week our fashion blogger friends Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan, the sartorial geniuses behind Go Fug Yourself, will feature some of their favorite looks of the week in this space. We hope you enjoy it!

This week’s big discussion point on Go Fug Yourself was whether Emma Watson’s Harry Potter premiere dress was fabulous and visionary and beautifully fitting, or Scarlett O’Hara on an acid trip. (We came down on the “fug” side, to the surprise of no one.) Contrast that with the innately dramatic Tilda Swinton, whose W shoot was so overdone and crazy that it came off as effortless. In other magazine-related news, we lamented Sarah Jessica Parker’s recent Vogue cover, although it was nothing compared to the the melty-faced mess of Katie Holmes on InStyle. The ESPY Awards were the usual trove of fuggery, the alpha and omega of which was Brian Wilson. We fervently hope that he and Justin Theroux turn out to be the same person. Can you imagine? It would be Us Weekly’s happiest hour — although we’re not sure how Jennifer Aniston would feel. And finally, in honor of Harry Potter’s final installment, we did a fug-through-the-ages of Helena Bonham Carter. It was… there isn’t a word. So we invented one: fabtremendicent.

1. To the surprise of no one, Twilight won big at last night’s MTV Movie Awards: Eclipse won the popcorn for Best Movie, while Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart took home the night’s big acting trophies. Oh, and at some point Pattinson and Taylor Lautner made out or something. [via MTV]

2. Meanwhile, on the weekend’s other awards ceremony, Spike TV’s Guys Choice Awards, Jennifer Aniston was honored for her Decade of Hotness. The show will air on Spike this Friday, June 10th. [via PopEater]

3. The Italy-based fourth season Jersey Shore has set its premiere date: August 4th. Honestly, between reports about Ronnie and The Situation‘s fight and the news of Snooki smashing into a police car, we feel like we’ve already seen it. [via WSJ]

4. The nominees for the first Critics Choice Television Awards were announced earlier this morning. Modern Family leads the pack at six nods, with Mad Men close behind at five. Boardwalk Empire, 30 Rock, The Good Wife, and Justified are also well represented. See a full list of nominees at The Wrap.

5. Kanye West has finally released the video for “Monster,” which leaked all the way back in December. This time, it comes with a disclaimer: “The following content is in no way to be interpreted as misogynistic or negative towards any group of people. It is an art piece and it shall be taken as such.” Huh. Watch it at Vulture.

Bonus link: Watch Brian Eno interviewed on Al Jazeera

There are relatively few female stoner characters in pop culture — a fact that seems surprisingly given a recent study that shows that while teen boys are more likely to smoke pot than their female counterparts, the girls are more likely to become addicted. And while there is currently a stoner road trip comedy in development with Natalie Portman entitled Best Buds,who knows when the mom-to-be will actually find time to star in and produce it. So in the meantime, we’ve come up with a list of women from film and TV to help you get your heavy-lidded lady fix.

Read More »

1. Ashton Kutcher’s Twitter account (which currently has almost 6.4 million followers) was anonymously hacked yesterday by someone at TED 2011 who was trying to demonstrate that many of our favorite web applications don’t use high-security encryption to protect their data. Point made. [via Gawker]

2. The lovely Diane Lane has signed on to play Martha Kent in the new Superman movie. Says director Zack Snyder: “This was a very important piece of casting for me because Martha Kent is the woman whose values helped shape the man we know as Superman. We are thrilled to have Diane in the role because she can convey the wisdom and the wonder of a woman whose son has powers beyond her imagination.” [via Deadline]

3. Cameron Crowe’s documentary The Union, a film about the creative life of Elton John, will open the 2011 Tribeca Film Festival on April 20th; a performance by the rock icon himself will follow the free, outdoor screening. [via ComingSoon]

4. In case you’re wondering just how much Justin Bieber’s hair is worth, some clippings put up for auction on eBay by Ellen DeGeneres just sold for $40,668. [via NYDN]

5. Jennifer Aniston’s 10,000-square-foot mansion in Beverly Hills just hit the market for a whopping $42 million. Drool over the images and read the rather funny listing here.

Bonus link: Soundtrack for Living

Editor’s note: Each Friday, our internet-savvy friends over at BuzzFeed curate a post for us that’s filled with links to some of the most talked-about items on the web that week. Enjoy!

While protests in Wisconsin and unrest in Libya raged on, what was really on the people’s minds was hair. Seriously. Check out the hair and makeup on Gaddafi’s all-girl guard.

The Internet masses had a collective panic attack over Justin Bieber’s latest haircut, dropped their jaws over Jennifer Aniston’s new ‘do, and gawked at John Travolta’s male pattern baldness.

In New York news, Mercedes sent their fashion police around Manhattan to profile the best-dressed among us.

Meanwhile, someone claiming to represent hacktivist group Anonymous issued a threat to the equally trollish Westboro Baptist Church earlier this week. The difference between Anonymous and the WBC is that the latter encourages hate among their own children.

Speaking of kids, one career conscious little girl captured the Internet’s heart this week. As is the trend, a catchy Autotuned club mix soon followed.

1. Get ready to bro it out at Lollapalooza this year. An early report points to Eminem, Foo Fighters, and Muse headlining the festival, which takes place August 5-7 at Chicago’s Grant Park. [Chicago Tribune]

2. A portrait Picasso painted of his teenage mistress, Marie-Therese Walter, sold for £25,241,250 (about $36 million) at a Sotheby’s London auction last night. [Telegraph]

3. Frank Gehry‘s massive, glassy Louis Vuitton Foundation for Creation project in Paris has been put on hold by French courts. [UnBeige]

4. Jude Law and Sienna Miller have split up again. Honestly, we didn’t realize they were back together. [Washington Post]

5. The Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) will honor Ricky Martin for finally coming out of the closet and Kristin Chenoweth for sticking up for queer actors at their Media Awards next month. [AP]

Bonus link: Tila Tequila and Jennifer Aniston on “Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis.” Really.

Today at Flavorpill, we wished that we had letterhead as cool as Batman creator Bob Kane’s was. We saw proof of how tech tools transformed New York’s sex trade over the past 20 years. We stopped by Andy Warhol’s old Upper East Side digs. We surprised that monkeys know how to facepalm. We wondered if a new Josh Schwartz show called Georgetown could be the next Gossip Girl. We tried to imagine a world where Jennifer Aniston was a cast member of Saturday Night Live instead of Friends. We were confused by the fact that Harlequin is trying to (or pretending to try to… it’s kind of unclear) patent kissing. We looked at the first stills from the upcoming film adaptation of On the Road. We watched Beethoven’s “Moonlight Sonata” as seen through ripples in milk. We wanted to play a round of The Oregon Trail in real life. And finally, we thought that this list of ten recipes you can make in your coffee pot might come in handy sometime — particularly the chocolate fondue.

1. Eminem’s Recovery has been confirmed by Nielsen SoundScan as the best-selling album of 2010, with 3.42 million copies sold since its release in June; Katy Perry’s “California Gurls” was of most popular song of the year, with 4.4 million downloads. [via Vulture]

2. In what may be a move to harness some of Mad Men’s TV magic, NBC has ordered a historical series about Playboy bunnies as its first drama pilot for the 2011–2012 season. We think it should star Lane Pryce’s hot girl friend, Toni Charles. [via Deadline]

3. Some of you know that last night Queen Latifah hosted the 37th Annual People’s Choice Awards. But can you explain to us what was up with the evening’s first presenter, Jennifer Aniston? We had visions of poor Anna Nicole at the American Music Awards… [via Gawker.tv]

4. Robert Pattinson will star in David Cronenberg’s new film, Cosmopolis, which is an adaptation of the Don DeLillo novel of the same name. Marion Cotillard and Paul Giamatti are rumored to co-star. [via THR]

5. J.J. Abrams’ Bad Robot is developing Pulp, “an hour-long crime drama set in a slightly heightened reality,” and will start shopping it around to networks as early as next week. [via TVLine]

Bonus link: A history of writers in New York City

1. Yesterday Google gave all of its employees $1,000 cash “holiday bonuses” and 2011 salary increases of at least 10%. Are you jealous? [via Business Insider]
2. Cosby Show alum Malcolm-Jamal Warner will appear in an upcoming episode of Community as Andre, the ex-husband of Shirley. Do you think this character will be dyslexic, like Theo Huxtable? [via EW]
3. The creative team behind The Hills and Jersey Shore have reportedly approached Jennifer Aniston about having her own reality series. [via Contact Music]
4. A black-and-white Coke bottle on canvas by Andy Warhol sold for $35.36 million yesterday at Sotheby’s contemporary and post-war art auction — that’s $10 million more than they were expecting it to fetch. [via Yahoo!]
5. Channing Tatum is in negotiations to join Jonah Hill in the cast of 21 Jump Street remake. We’re guessing he’ll play Johnny Depp’s old part from the TV series. [via Deadline]

Bonus Link: Cee Lo Performs “Fuck You” Uncensored on The Colbert Report