Oscar Headlines: Predictions That Won’t Come True (But Are Still Awesome)


“The plan is to craft [the show] as a combination vaudeville show and nightclub–where awards just happen to be dispensed.” So say Oscar producers Bill Condon (of Dreamgirls fame) and Laurence Mark, on what is sure to be a shitshow of an award show.

We’re actually pumped that they’re putting so much effort into the unintentionally hilarious aspect of the event–and that’s all we have to say about that. After the jump, choice Academy Award predictions that have almost nothing to do with who will win and everything to do with how absurd the night might be.

Kate <3s Leo: Mark Lisanti forsees Kate Winslet’s acceptance speech, and other amazing maybe-moments in this list of 25 Random Oscar Prediction Things [Vanity Fair]

Ricky Gervais writing material for Hugh Jackman? NYMag predicts that might mean more awesome Holocaust jokes! Also, this one’s an oldie, but still our favorite: The Sexiest Awards Handoff Ever? [Vulture]

Who will Jennifer Aniston be wearing to face-off with Brangelina? John Mayer. Best Supporting Act of Desperation? [MTV]

“In a way the Oscars are like community theater on amazing steroids.” [NYT]

Due to tough economic times, the Academy might have to give out leftover Emmy statuettes. We’re ok with that if it means more Tina Fey [The Onion]