It’s an important day in Tabloidland: People has named its Sexiest Man Alive for 2010. And the winner is… Ryan Reynolds. Hmm. Here are Flavorpill HQ, we greeted the news with a resounding “meh” — and then proceeded to brainstorm a list we liked better. We’ve taken 10 selections from People ’s preview gallery and come up with our own, less obvious, alternatives. Because let’s face it: we don’t need anyone to tell us that Jake Gyllenhaal and Jon Hamm are hot. Check out our list after the jump.
The Mad Man
People picked: Jon Hamm
Our pick: Vincent Kartheiser. Listen, no one can argue about Hamm’s sexiness. And everyone dismisses preppy, slicked-backed Pete Campbell, who’s always making that obnoxious bitch face. But check out Kartheiser in real life, with piercing blue eyes, slightly shaggy hair, and a couple days’ worth of scruff and see if you don’t start to look at the actor in a new light.
The underwear model
People picked: Kellan Lutz
Our pick: Mechad Brooks. While most of the Calvin Klein “X” campaign hype surrounded Lutz, of Twilight fame, let’s not forget the stunning six pack on Brooks, best known for playing Tara’s man Eggs on True Blood. Unfortunately, his two most recent projects — ABC’s The Deep End and My Generation — both faced early cancellation. Here’s hoping he finds a small-screen role that sticks.
The rapper-actor
People picked: Drake
Our pick: Kid CuDi. Drake may have made the move from teen Degrassi star to Young Money phenom with a hot debut album, but we’ve always preferred the quirkiness of Kid CuDi. He hangs with Solange Knowles, stars in HBO’s How to Make It in America, and isn’t afraid to get really freaking weird and dark. Drake might be the guy you bring home to meet Mom, but CuDi’s the one you’d sneak out to party with.
The Gleek
People picked: Matthew Morrison
Our pick: John Stamos. Yes, he’s not as young as he used to be. (Want to feel old, guys? Uncle Jesse is 47!) And yes, his character did swoop in to sweep Mr. Schue’s true love, Emma, off her feet. But can you deny that he looked great in a full leather suit as Eddie on the Rocky Horror episode? No, you cannot.
The middle-aged rocker
People picked: Jon Bon Jovi
Our pick: Stephen Malkmus. With all the great, attractive musicians out there, People chooses… Bon Jovi? Really? Are they kidding us? Meanwhile, Malkmus is only a few years younger, keeps releasing interesting solo work, and recently revived his game-changing ’90s band Pavement for a sold-out, enthusiastically received tour. And with a style that mixes sexy male librarian and West Coast slacker, he’s not bad to look at, either.
The True Blood stud
People picked: Joe Manganiello
Our pick: Kevin Alejandro. Maybe we’re broken, but werewolves never seem to do it for us. Too feral, perhaps? In any case, as far as newer and more under-appreciated True Blood cast members go, we’re going to have to go with Alejandro, who plays Lafayette’s witchy, new boyfriend Jesus. Gaze into those soulful eyes for a moment and tell us you don’t see what we’re saying here.
The comeback kid
People picked: Robert Downey Jr.
Our pick: Kanye West. Downey Jr. is an excellent and attractive actor with a great story. But you know who else who spent some time fighting substance-related demons and general disgrace, only to come back stronger than ever? That’s right: Yeezy. Few things are hotter than trying to become a better person, and it doesn’t hurt to have perhaps the best album of your career to show for it. “Power” is a sexy song, y’all! And just in case you forgot, Kanye is still the most stylish rapper out there.
The Social Network perk
People picked: Justin Timberlake
Our pick: Andrew Garfield. Is it news to anyone that Justin Timberlake is still hot, even when he plays real-life computer nerd Sean Parker (who, it must be said, does not share JT’s genetic gifts)? Allow us, then, to draw your attention to Garfield, who played Eduardo Saverin in what was definitely the film’s most subtle — and arguably its best — performance. He may have been even better in Never Let Me Go. Garfield’s is a quiet, bookish sexiness, which we often actually prefer to the flashier varieties.
The Love and Other Drugs addiction
People picked: Jake Gyllenhaal
Our pick: Gabriel Macht. Just like Timberlake, Gyllenhaal qualifies as “still hot” — as in, his attractiveness has been common knowledge for as long as we can remember. But you know who doesn’t get nearly the amount of love he deserves? Macht, who is Gyllenhaal’s towheaded co-star in the upcoming Love and Other Drugs.
The hunky Canuck
People picked: Ryan Reynolds, Sexiest Man Alive 2010
Our pick: Owen Pallett. Is it just us, or does Reynolds always have kind of a “duh” look on his face? For all we know, he’s got an IQ of 165, but either way, we prefer Owen Pallett — the undeniably intelligent Canadian multi-instrumentalist who used to go by the wonderfully geeky handle Final Fantasy. We love his orchestral flourishes, his Twitter grandstanding, and his wide-eyed, floppy-haired, somewhat geeky good looks. But ladies, please, don’t waste your time throwing panties at the stage: Pallett prefers men.