Last Night’s SNL: Just A Lot of Screeching

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Last night’s SNL hurt our ears. There was so much screeching and shouting and high pitched wailing that we ran for the earplugs about 10 minutes in. Part of that had to do, we’re certain, with the extremely large-mouthed and exuberant Russell Brand, who hosted last night, but they also seemed to choose every loud sketch they possibly could. Look, we’re no grandmas, but we do like a certain amount of aural comfort with our entertainment, especially the kind we get while we’re sitting in our living rooms. Click through for the few high points and many, many low (and loud) ones.

Best: Russell Brand’s Monologue

Although this was was what started off the show at a very high decibel, we happen to love men joking about their own pants. And since we’re only used to seeing Brand in movies where he’s insufferable, a little bit of faux-modesty went a long way. Plus, we really loved imagining Katy Perry making him go check for burglars. Stars, they’re just like us.

Best: Weekend Update: Eminem and Lil’ Wayne

The sketch itself — a Valentine’s Day song with all the bad words cut out, leaving long stretches of backbeat — was negligible, but when Taran Killam busted out a spot-on Eminem, you could even hear everyone in the studio howl with pleasure.

Best: British Movie

We thought this went on a little long, but it definitely worked, and was fairly funny. Not laugh out loud funny, but made-us-smile funny. Also, anything that reminds us of Brad Pitt as a gypsy king is a good bet. However, this sketch included shrieking. Just saying.

Best: Weekend Update: Stephon

This sketch. Will. Never. Get. Old. Especially when Bill Hader breaks down in the middle.

Worst: Vacation Giveaway

We’re not quite sure why SNL would repeat this annoying sketch, especially because Brand didn’t add anything to it except to satisfy our already-sated wish for the British host to do an American accent. It’s just an excuse for Kristen Wiig to make her noises and faces and wiggle all over. And touch Brand’s package. Completely unfunny and way too much screeching.

Worst: Livin’ Single

This just made us uncomfortable, and not in the good way. In the put down whatever you’re eating and wait it out way. Miley Cyrus, what are you doing? Also, there was yelling.

Worst: Royal Taster

We don’t think Russell Brand knows that things aren’t inherently funnier if you scream them at the top of your lungs.

Worst: A Spot of Tea

This one completely eludes us. Ha, ha, three men are dressed up as old ladies. It’s not any funnier if they drop their tea on themselves and scream for four minutes. It’s just, you know, loud and irritating.

Worst: Bill O’Reilly Cold Open

Well, it was boring, but at least it wasn’t loud.