James Bond as a Runaway Dad Not a Movie We Want to See


According to an interview in New York Magazine with QUANTUM OF SOLACE director MARC FORSTER, Oscar-winning screenwriter PAUL HAGGIS wanted to make James Bond a dad in the latest flick.

“Haggis had an idea they weren’t fond of, and I didn’t know if it would work or not,” says Forster. “The idea was that Vesper in the last movie, maybe she had a kid, and there would be an orphan out there. It wasn’t anything to insult the franchise. But they felt it wasn’t particularly Bond — him looking for the kid. I think Paul thought he just leaves the kid, he doesn’t deal with it. But [the producers] thought that would be really nasty, too, because Bond was an orphan himself. If he would find a kid, would he just leave it? They were so vehemently against it. That was the only time I saw, really, ‘No, we can’t do that.’ They said, ‘Once he finds the kid, Bond can’t just leave the kid. It’s not right.'”

Agreed Forster — we’re glad that you didn’t let Haggis steer the Aston Martin down that melodramatic lane as he is wont to do. It wouldn’t be right — just think of all the “shaken not stirred” baby jokes.

After the jump 10 additional film icons who we think would make really bad parents; add your own picks in the comments.

1. CARRIE BRADSHAW – she would sell her baby for Cosmopolitan money

2. INDIANA JONES – remember how awkward he was with Short Round?

3. RICK BLAINE – a baby would have gotten in the way of a beautiful friendship

4. ANDY DUFRESNE – tunneling out of prison is much harder when you’re wearing a papoose

5. NURSE MILDRED RATCHED – no child deserves that mother

6. PRINCESS LEIA ORGANA – famed gold bikini body out the door

7. THE DUDE – we can just picture him drinking White Russians from a bottle

8. GOLLUM – most babies are already ugly enough

9. TYLER DURDEN – that baby would have behavioral problems

10. NEO – do they make trench coats for babies?