If the Academy Awards are “The Gay Super Bowl,” then the day Bravo announces a new programming slate may be the queer-TV equivalent of Christmas. As The Hollywood Reporter notes, the 2011-12 season will be the successful network’s most ambitious ever, featuring no fewer than 11 new series and an armload of second-season renewals (welcome back, Top Chef Just Desserts). After the jump, we rate each forthcoming show for its dramatic potential and camp appeal and try to predict whether it will be worth watching.
Interior Therapy With Jeff Lewis Jeff and Jenni, of Flipping Out fame, move into some poor, hapless people’s home, snark about how awful it looks, and the spend five days fixing it. Drama factor: 9 Camp appeal: 7 Funny or frustrating? Probably both Will we watch what happens? In spite of ourselves, yes
It’s a Brad, Brad World Rachel Zoe’s former assistant, Brad Goreski, strikes out on his own in a series that follows both his new business and his personal life. Drama factor: 7 Camp appeal: 6 Funny or frustrating? We’re guessing the latter Will we watch what happens? Confession: We never got through more than a few minutes of Zoe’s show because we found her so goddamn irritating. That means we’re not immediately interested in Goreski, so we’ll likely only tune in if It’s a Brad, Brad World gets rave reviews. But if someone would get Kelly Cutrone’s former assistant Andrew Mukamal his own show, we’d tune in every week.
The Therapists The reality series follows a group of (undoubtedly good-looking) therapists, in and out of the office. Drama factor: 8 Camp appeal: 2 Funny of frustrating? Frustrating! (Also, probably, depressing!) Will we watch what happens? Not likely. This Celeb Rehab-inspired trend of making addiction and mental illness into a public spectacle just makes us feel dirty.
Mad Fashion Former Project Runway contestant Chris March — you know, the big guy who liked to do drag and make clothing out of human hair — and his merry band of freakazoids do their thing. Drama factor: 6 Camp appeal: 11 Funny or frustrating? Hilarious Will we watch what happens? You better believe it
Million Dollar Listing NY The LA real estate show goes bicoastal. Drama factor: 7 Camp appeal: 5 Funny or frustrating? If it’s anything like NY real estate, option B, please Will we watch what happens? We occasionally zoned out in front of the original series’ house porn, but we just might watch more faithfully now that the show’s in our home city.
Most Eligible: Dallas Sexy, successful singletons do the Texas socialite thing. Drama factor: 8 Camp appeal: 6 Funny or frustrating? Just gross Will we watch what happens? Nope. This sound like an even more boring version of at least five shows we’ve already seen. Here’s hoping this one doesn’t become a franchise.
Project Soulmate Like Millionaire Matchmaker, we assume, but starring NY-based yenta Lori Zaslow. Drama factor: 7 Camp appeal: 6 Funny or frustrating? Hopefully, both Will we watch what happens? When it comes to matchmakers, our heart belongs to Patti Stanger. But if Zaslow can deliver the same mix of tough love, utter kookiness, and weird assistants, we might tune in.
Ready to Wear A show that revolves around the staff of NYC consignment mecca Second Time Around. Drama factor: 6 Camp appeal: 5 Funny or frustrating? Neither? Will we watch what happens? We want to say we won’t, but we do have a weakness for vintage clothes… Still, we can’t imagine getting addicted to the personalities involved.
Roblé and Co. “Hip-hop chef” Roblé Ali and his opinionated sister start a Brooklyn-based catering business. Drama factor: 7 Camp appeal: 3 Funny or frustrating? Gonna go with funny, although we’re sure there will be frustrating moments Will we watch what happens? Food, hip hop, Brooklyn? We’re there.
Tabatha Takes Over Bravo’s salon makeover stalwart brings her transformative powers to small business of all kinds. Drama factor: 8 Camp appeal: 5 Funny or frustrating? Frustrating Will we watch what happens? Negative. We’re bored with Tabatha, and Gordon Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares fulfills our need for this type of show.
Miss Advised An all-female, all-single cast of relationship gurus date and dispense advice. Drama factor: 7 Camp appeal: 7 Funny or frustrating? Honestly, it sounds excruciating Will we watch what happens? No. Really, the last thing we’re looking to watch is Sex and the City as reality TV.