Rhetorical Questions Inspired By the Weekend Box Office
1. Fast & Furious – $72.51m Why would you pay to see that when you can watch Fast & Bicurious for free?
2. Monsters vs. Aliens – $33.51m What happened kiddies? You couldn’t maintain that opening weekend momentum? Your mom wouldn’t take you to see it twice??
3. The Haunting in Connecticut – $9.55m Do you know that this one is based on a true story? That boy who’s puking on the movie poster just got a whole lot freakier, huh?
4. Knowing – $8.13m Was this all the sad dudes who couldn’t get tickets to Fast & Furious?
5. I Love You, Man – $7.85m Why did you go and see this instead of Adventureland? WHY?? Bill Hader needs your love more, man.