1. Abercrombie & Fitch wants The Situation to stop wearing its clothes — and is offering up a “substantial payment” to make sure that it happens. From the company’s official statement: “We understand that the show is for entertainment purposes, but believe this association is contrary to the aspirational nature of our brand, and may be distressing to many of our fans.” [via Speakeasy]
2. Following outcry from fans and objections by the singer’s estate, Kiss has been dropped from the bill of an upcoming Michael Jackson tribute concert because Gene Simmons has previously said in interviews that he believes the pop star was a child molester. [via Rolling Stone]
3. After Universal unceremoniously ditched the project last month, Ron Howard and Brian Grazer are looking for new ways to distribute their adaptation of Stephen King’s Dark Tower series — including Netflix — but don’t look for anything to happen until next year. [via THR]
4. Beloved film critic (and Flavorpill favorite) Roger Ebert has posted the opening pages of his forthcoming memoir on his website. Life Itself hits shelves on September 13. [via PopCandy]
5. Bono — who bought $210 million worth of shares in Facebook back in 2009 — is about to make $1 billion on his investment thanks to this week’s $65 billion valuation of the social networking site. Hopefully he won’t spend all of that cash on giant claws… [via NME]
Bonus Buzz: Juggalo Justin Bieber