5 Headlines from the Last 24 Hours That Shouldn’t Be Funny But Are

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1. Historicaltweets.com Re-imagines Famous Moments through Tweets [via Time] Why this IS funny: “Lassie: Idiot child fell down the mine shaft again. That makes 3 times in one week.” Why this ISN’T funny: Lassie hated his job 😦

2. Bret Michaels injured at the Tony Awards [via People] Why this IS funny: The curtain for the “Rock of Ages” set at the Tonys nearly decapitated Bret Michaels!!! Why this ISN’T funny: The curtain for the Rock of Ages set at the Tonys nearly decapitated Bret Michaels.

3. Coin Marks Henry VIII’s Anniversary [via BBC] Why this IS funny: Hey, wasn’t that the super fat monarch who had six wives… Why this ISN’T funny: …and had two of them decapitated?

4. Inmate’s 55 Hour Erection Agony [via NYP] Why this IS funny: Who ever thought this could be a problem? Why this ISN’T funny: It’s just impressive. Two full days is incredible.

5. Hot Dogs Used to Put Foreign Guest at Ease [via NYT] Why this IS funny: Teddy Roosevelt to Queen Elizabeth: “Very simple. Push it into your mouth and keep pushing it until it is all gone.” Why this ISN’T funny: “That’s what she said.” These jokes aren’t funny anymore.