Won’t Someone Think of the Children’s Flicks?

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Remember when you were little and watched movies like The Little Mermaid, Cinderella, and The Lion King? Those were the days. Disney films seriously ruled, and they had incredible soundtracks to boot. So we’re wondering, what happened to great animated movies for kids? (Before you shout “Pixar!” we’d like to suggest that in spite of the medium, recent films like Wall-E and Up are geared more for adults.) Read on to find out what shameful flicks kids are forced to watch today, but be warned: some of your favorite comedians and foods are involved.

Disaster #1: G Force: Gerbil FBI I think the name pretty much says it all. Gerbils. In the FBI. Say whaaat? But, I mean, who knows? The cast looks pretty impressive: Steve Carrell, Nicholas Cage, Penelope Cruz, Tracy Morgan, Zach Braff, and Will Arnett lend voice to the animated rodents and their cohorts/keepers. But again: Gerbils. In the FBI.

Disaster #2: Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs It was a beloved children’s book — kind of like a fairy tale, but not really. The movie looks cute, but it’s all based on the premise that the main character, who is one of those stereotypical crazy inventors, finds a way to turn water into food in order to solve the world’s hunger problems. So then, every time it rains, food falls from the sky. Leave it the fattest nation in the world to make a movie about hamburger rain. Really, people? Really?

Click here to view the trailer.

Disaster #3: The Princess and the Frog At last, Disney decided to return to their tested, tried, and true formula: hand drawn animation. Yay! But then they decided to come up with a premise that many are calling both sexist and racist. Boo! We hope that Disney’s first African-American Princess, Maddy, proves the rumors wrong, but it’s hard to tell from this trailer.