How to Alienate Music Reviewers and Kill Album Sales


Sure, some publicists are vapid hype-hawkers, but the vast majority are genuine, thoughtful, and invested individuals. Unfortunately label concerns over bootlegging and leaks often make it hard for them to do their jobs. So, I didn’t blame the publicist when I received a promotional copy of Hercules & Love Affair’s new album so locked down with anti-bootlegging measures that it’s impossible to actually play. I blamed EVERYONE. Then I tried to find a use, any use, for the album.

An unmastered 128k rip would make me hesitant in the first place (that’s noticeably inferior audio and I’d hate to judge on what’s essentially the quality of a from-the-radio recording), but the Cactus technology makes it so that it will not “play or upload on any computer system.” One is left to wonder why an additional step of overdubbed voices (presumably saying “this is not for release” or something along that line) was deemed necessary. Maybe they knew that I needed a new coaster?

OMG, I’m so excited. It’s a new Hercules album, packed with disco mixes like they do in their live DJ sets. Oh happy days!

Wait!? So does that mean I can’t play it anywhere but a stereo CD player? Every journalist I know switched to iTunes and importing 5 years ago… I don’t get it, you can already get bootlegs of their DJ sets online… I’ll just download one of those. But what the hell am I supposed to do with this CD?

Of course!!!

Unbootleggable perhaps, but it deals pretty well with water….