Everyone’s favorite spy franchise turns 50 next month. To commemorate five decades of James Bond, MGM is releasing a 22-film Blu-ray set tomorrow that 007 fanatics won’t want to miss. The expansive collection coincides with Sam Mendes’ Skyfall (in UK theaters on October 26 and stateside November 9), starring Daniel Craig who returns to the iconic role of James Bond. A bleach-blonde Javier Bardem plays the gentleman spy’s adversary, and Bond girls Bérénice Marlohe and Naomie Harris join him.
The British Secret Service agent is known for his sophisticated style, cool gadgets, and daring international exploits — with a bevy of unique villains and beautiful women. While MI6 is busy sipping martinis and racing across country in his Aston Martin DB5, he’s always equipped with a cheeky one-liner to set the scene. Six actors delivered Bond’s dry comebacks, and we’ve featured some of the best past the break. Bond is known for his post-mortem puns, but 007 took every opportunity to make a memorable — and often groan-worthy — statement. It’s all in good fun. Celebrate with us, and check out 50 of our favorite James Bond one-liners, below.
Sexy Snark
Tomorrow Never Dies
Bond: “I always enjoyed learning a new tongue.” Moneypenny: “You always were a cunning linguist, James.”
Thunderball
Bond: “My dear, uncooperative Domino.” Domino: “How do you know that? How do you know my friends call me Domino?” Bond: “It’s on the bracelet on your ankle.” Domino: “So, what sharp little eyes you’ve got.” Bond: “Wait ’till you get to my teeth.”
The World is Not Enough
Bond: “I was wrong about you.” Christmas Jones: “Yeah, how so?” Bond: “I thought Christmas only comes once a year.”
The Man with the Golden Gun
Bond: “Miss Anders! I didn’t recognize you with your clothes on.”
Octopussy
Vijay: “I hear the Island is exclusively for women, no men allowed.” Bond: “Sexual discrimination, I will definitely have to pay it a visit.”
Goldfinger
Pussy Galore: “My name is Pussy Galore.” Bond: “I must be dreaming.”
Bond: “You’re a women of many parts, Pussy.”
GoldenEye
Xenia Onatopp: “You don’t need the gun, Commander.” Bond: “Well, that depends on your definition of safe sex.”
Dr. No
Bond: “Don’t worry. I’m not supposed to be here either.” Honey Ryder: “Are you looking for shells too?” Bond: “No, I’m just looking.”
License To Kill
Bond: “I’ll do anything for a woman with a knife.”
Diamonds Are Forever
Plenty O’Toole: “Hi, I’m Plenty.” Bond: “But of course you are.” Plenty O’Toole: “Plenty O’Toole.” Bond: “Named after your father perhaps?”
Never Say Never Again
Fatima Blush: “Oh, how reckless of me. I made you all wet.” Bond: “Yes, but my martini is still dry. My name is James.”
Post-Mortem Puns
(After a hearse flies over a cliff and explodes) “I think they were on their way to a funeral.”
(After a gangster is crushed in a car) “He had a pressing engagement.”
(After feeding the bad guy a shark gun pellet and watching him explode) “He always did have an inflated opinion of himself.”
(After harpooning someone) “I think he got the point.”
(After a villain’s death by snowblower) “He had a lot of guts.”
(After using a villainess like a human shield while dancing) “Do you mind if my friend sits this one out? She’s just dead.”
(After cutting his own boot off his foot and watching a baddie fall to his death) “He got the boot.”
(After watching a villain get crushed under a statue of the Duke of Wellington) “He met his Waterloo.”
(After watching a villain fall from a cliff) “He had no head for heights.”
(After electrocuting a henchman) “Shocking. Positively shocking.”
Tête-à-Tête with the Baddies
Octopussy
Kamal Khan: “You seem to have this nasty habit of surviving.” James Bond: “You know what they say about the fittest.”
The World is Not Enough
Elektra King: “I could have given you the world.” Bond: “The world is not enough.” Elektra King: “Foolish sentiment.” Bond: “Family motto.”
Lachaise: “I’m giving you the opportunity to walk out with the money, Mr. Bond.” Bond: “I’m giving you the opportunity to walk out with your life.”
Moonraker
Dr. Goodhead: “You know him?” Bond: “Not socially. His name’s Jaws. He kills people.”
Die Another Day
Mr. Kil: “I’m Mr. Kil.” Bond: “Now there’s a name to die for.”
Casino Royale
Le Chiffre: “You changed your shirt, Mr Bond. I hope our little game isn’t causing you to perspire.” Bond: “A little. But I won’t consider myself to be in trouble until I start weeping blood.”
You Only Live Twice
Blofeld: “James Bond, allow me to introduce myself. I am Ernst Stavro Blofeld. They told me you were assassinated in Hong Kong.” Bond: “Yes, this is my second life.”
The Man with the Golden Gun
Francisco Scaramanga: “You get as much pleasure out of killing as I do, so why don’t you admit it?” James Bond: “I admit killing you would be a pleasure.” Francisco Scaramanga: “Then you should have done that when you first saw me. On the other hand, the English don’t consider it sporting to kill in cold blood, do they?” James Bond: “Don’t count on that.”
Thunderball
Fiona Volpe: “Do you like wild things Mr. Bond, Mr. James Bond.” Bond: “Wild? You should be locked up in a cage.”
GoldenEye
Alec Trevelyan (Agent 006 turned bad): “James… what an unpleasant surprise.” Bond: “We aim to please.”
Never Say Never Again
Largo: “Do you lose as gracefully as you win?” James Bond: “I don’t know, I’ve never lost.”
Revealing Remarks
The Living Daylights
Bond: “Don’t think. Just let it happen.”
Tomorrow Never Dies
Bond: “You were pretty good with that hook.” Wai Lin: “Thanks. It comes from growing up in a rough neighborhood. You were pretty good on that bike.” Bond: “Thank you. It comes from not growing up at all.”
Thunderball
Pat Fearing: “What exactly do you do?” Bond: “Oh, I travel… a sort of licensed troubleshooter.”
The World is Not Enough
Bond: “If you’re Q, does that make him R?”
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service
Draco: “My apologies for the way you were brought here. I wasn’t sure you’d accept a formal invitation.” Bond: “There’s always something formal about the point of a pistol.”
License To Kill
Bond: “In my business, you prepare for the unexpected.” Franz Sanchez: “And what business is that?” Bond: “I help people with problems.” Franz Sanchez: “Problems solver.” Bond: “More of a problem eliminator.”
Goldfinger
Bond: “My dear girl, there are some things that just aren’t done. Such as, drinking Dom Perignon ’53 above the temperature of 38 degrees Fahrenheit. That’s just as bad as listening to the Beatles without earmuffs.”
GoldenEye
Natalya Simonova: “Do you destroy every vehicle you get into?” Bond: “Standard operating procedure. Boys with toys.”
Xenia Onatopp: “Enjoy it while it lasts.” Bond: “The very words I live by.”
Jack Wade: “Jack Wade, CIA.” Bond: “James Bond, stiff-ass Brit.”
Bond: “Who is the competition?” Jack Wade: “AH, an ex-KGB guy. Touch mother. Got a limp in his right leg. Name’s Zukovsky.” Bond: “Valentin Dmitrovitch Zukovsky?” Jack Wade: “Yeah, you know him?” Bond: “I gave him the limp.”
Die Another Day
Bond: “Do you believe in bad luck?” Jinx: “Let’s just say my relationships don’t seem to last.” Bond: “I know the feeling.”
Diamonds Are Forever
(After being buried in a sewer, said to a rat) “Well, one of us smells like a tart’s handkerchief. [sniffs] I’m afraid it’s me. Sorry, old boy.”
Casino Royale
Bond: “Why is it that people who can’t take advice always insist on giving it?”
Vesper Lynd: “It doesn’t bother you? Killing all those people?” Bond: “Well, I wouldn’t be very good at my job if it did.”
Quantum of Solace
M: “Bond, I need you back.” Bond: “I never left.”
The Spy Who Loved Me
Bond: “Mmm, maybe I misjudged Stromberg. Any man who drinks Dom Perignon ’52 can’t be all bad.”
Bond: “Which bullet has my name on it? The first or the last?” Agent XXX: “I have never failed on a mission, Commander. Any mission.” Bond: “In that case, Major, one of use is bound to end up gravely disappointed, because neither have I.”