Celebrity Twitter Commentary on the Royal Baby: A Taxonomy

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People often criticize journalists for their imprudence in the digital age, for the way they value the quick over the accurate, the now-available over the profound. And yet, every time a news event comes around, assuming it’s not a mass tragedy, it isn’t just the journalists who appear to hover over the keyboard, longing to make that perfect pun or quip that will travel across the nation’s smartphones. Yesterday, as news of the #RoyalBaby broke, we were watching how certain media personalities weighed in on the announcement.

1. The “Arguably Sincere Canned Tweet”…

… and its sub-genre, the “Arguably Sincere Canned Tweet with Inexplicably Pre-Prepared Graphic.”

2. The “Let’s Get Back to What’s Really Important” Tweet

3. The “Can’t Muster the Enthusiasm” Tweet

4. The “Arguably Creepy Attempt at Gravitas” Tweet

4. The “Deft Use of Inappropriate Language” Tweet

5. The “Neither Irreverent Nor Actually Funny” Tweet

We suggest eschewing all of these genres for the kind of tone S.E. Hinton, the author of The Outsiders, set:

A bit blunt, perhaps, but we like the way she managed to incorporate reference to her (awesome) work while poking fun at herself and the entire floofaroo. Plus, her Tweet provoked her to further offer this tidbit of information: