Girls has taken us on quite a journey over the past three years, from Season 1 (“The Season That Launched a Thousand Think Pieces”), to a dark and confusing Season 2 (“You’ll Never Want to Use Q-Tips Again”), to, finally, a refreshingly enjoyable Season 3 (“They Might All Be Kind of Starting to Grow Up”). But while the stories have become more interesting and some of Hannah’s outfits have improved, the Flavorwire staff has noticed a disturbing trend: often, Lena Dunham and Co. will plant a particular plot seed, then refuse to water it or even hint at its existence ever again.
What’s with all these unanswered questions? Not only does does it tease our curiosity and punish the close-watcher, but each dangling little loose end muddles the plot just a tad bit more. It can start to feel like some scenes are included simply to hit a single emotional note, or because Dunham was so smitten with the sound of her lines, she couldn’t bear to cut them despite their lack of relevance to the story.
This brings us to the top five loose ends that irked us from Season 3. Be sure to leave yours in the comments if we’ve left anything out. And Lena, if you’re reading this, what gives?
1. Marnie’s Cat
Remember the adorable kitten Marnie adopted in “Only Child”? The one she said was her “best friend”? What happened to her? When Winston got a cat on New Girl, we were treated to some delightful crazy cat-gentleman stories. Marnie’s cat, on the other hand, seems to have suffered the same fate as Schrödinger’s. Which is pretty sad, because adding a cat to her next YouTube music video might have given it a nudge toward going viral.
2. Hannah and Joe’s Flirtation
From the first moments of Hannah’s GQ job, it was clear that something was going to happen between her and her sweet and welcoming co-worker, Joe. That something, it turns out, was that his sweet and welcoming traits carried over to a drunken night, where he cleaned up Hannah’s vomit, helped her bathe, and let her sleep at his place without trying any funny business. He reminds her of the experience in the season’s penultimate episode, to which she exclaims, “That was our private moment!” and, after getting fired/quitting, Hannah asks, “Does it make you feel good to have a chubby girl paying attention to you?” What was the point of this entire relationship? Did he exist just as a brief foil to Adam? It feels like there’s some unfinished business here.
3. Shoshanna’s Meathead Boyfriend, Parker
One of Season 3’s best Shoshanna scenes had her accosting a lug named Parker in the NYU library, demanding to know whether he’s ready for a relationship. She talks circles around him in her special, rapid-fire Shoshanna way, and, stupefied, he agrees to give it a shot. Later, during sex, she’s extremely bored, but still, didn’t we deserve a little closure to this coupling?
4. Jessa’s Quick Drug Recovery
Maybe the writers thought we’d spent too much time getting Jessa clean, but after her weeks-long drug binge with Jasper, she seems to have cleaned up entirely in just one episode. One sad admission of “I am a junkie” and one flailing solo dance session, and then it’s time to happily hit the streets and find a job? Maybe we can chalk this up to the possibility that this is just how Jessa’s drug-addled mind and body work, but it seemed she went from rock bottom to healthy and responsible a little too fast. (If by healthy and responsible, we mean helping an old lady almost commit suicide, of course.)
5. Shoshanna’s Brain
Shoshanna’s brain was on the fritz this season. Granted, her entire life seemed to be on the fritz, but I just don’t think Dunham can decide if she wants Shoshanna to be quietly brilliant or a ditzy moron. Her “Beach House” accusations were completely on point, and brought back the Shosh we knew and loved from the past, who had lately been relegated to the background. But when she and Hannah conversed near hotel vending machines in “Truth or Dare,” the inane questions she was asking made me think she’d had a stroke. Same goes for her prattle at the opening night of Major Barbara in the season finale — would she really ask why the actors have British accents if it isn’t Shakespeare? She wants to be a powerful businesswoman, for Pete’s sake. I think she’s smarter than this.