The Greatest Summer Camp Movie Douchebags


Perhaps the most excruciating experience of growing up is being stuck in a remote summer camp, away from the comforts of home and being tormented by a bully, whether that person is a fellow camper or even a camp counselor taking advantage of a superiority complex. And if there’s one thing that the summer camp genre gets right, it’s the camp douchebag: the kind of person who, away from home, is determined to re-brand him or herself as Hot Shit by making life miserable for everyone else. As we head into summer camp season, let’s celebrate — or rather, rally against — the douchebags who have generally received their due thanks to the fantasy of cinema.

Andy, Wet Hot American Summer

Ugh, Andy. As much as his affinity for denim-on-denim is commendable, Camp Firewood’s heartthrob counselor was also the biggest jerk. But maybe that’s what makes him so damn sexy?

Jill Simmons, Camp

Before she’s poisoned by a young Anna Kendrick in the middle of her 11 ‘o’clock number, Camp‘s resident diva makes life hell for the rest of her fellow musical theatre enthusiasts. She may think she’s hot shit, but she didn’t even get the lead in Promises, Promises.

Gary Granger and Becky Martin-Granger, Addams Family Values

Look, I love a Thanksgiving-themed musical as much as the next guy (especially a production mounted mid-summer), but when these two lock up Wednesday in that shack and force her to watch Annie? Despicable.

Robbie, Dirty Dancing

There is absolutely nothing redeemable about a waiter at a Catskills resort whose two hobbies include getting women pregnant and Objectivism.

Tony Perkis, Heavyweights

Is there anyone who can play a douchebag better than Ben Stiller? (Does that, perhaps, say something?) But really, does it get any worse than a fat-shaming camp counselor?

Judy, Sleepaway Camp

I think it’s safe to say that we’ve all had a Judy in our lives — the unrepentant mean girl whose sole joy comes from giving us hell. Unfortunately for Judy, she’s murdered with a curling iron in a particularly unsettling way.

Pamela Voorhees, Friday the 13th

Losing a child in a tragic accident is a tough break for sure, but there’s no reason to take it out on every horny teenager you encounter, you know?

God, Jesus Camp

OK, I guess the parents and counselors in Jesus Camp are the real douchebags here, but if God existed, you’d think he’d step in after a while and say, “Hey, guys? Chill out.”