Yes, Ann Coulter wrote a ridiculous column about how the World Cup is an insult to American values, and no, I’m not going to link it here. The really remarkable thing about this whole sorry affair, which has been stinking up social media for the last couple of days, is that anyone still cares what Ann Coulter think. She’s the perfect example of someone who’s only in any way renowned because people pay attention to her for being an extremist; if people stopped giving her airtime, she would melt back into richly deserved obscurity. Like the rest of people on this list! Begone, all of you!
Ann Coulter
Anyone can write Ayn Rand fanfic, but that doesn’t make doing so newsworthy. Appreciating Coulter “ironically” is something we can do without, too — her rants aren’t ironic genius, they’re not fabulous trolling, and they’re most definitely not performance art. They’re the ravings of a crazy person whose grasp on reality can be charitably described as tenuous. And speaking of referring to somewhat famous people doing stupid shit as “performance art”…
Shia LeBeouf
Repeat after me: dumb stunts are not art. Dumb stunts are not art. Dumb stunts are not art.
Donald Trump
Generally, nefarious billionaires don’t get enough attention — people like the Koch Brothers, the Barclay Brothers, the ghastly Gina Rinehart, and other mega-rich tycoons manage to fly beneath the radar despite their considerable influence on society (most likely because, y’know, they own the media). Not so The Donald, however, whose Twitter presence is akin to the school bully standing on a table and bellowing “LOOK AT ME.” Look away. Maybe once you look back, he’ll be gone.
Richard Dawkins
It’s one of the sad facts of life that extremists tend to hijack conversations and turn them into giant shitfights. In this respect, Richard Dawkins is atheism’s answer to the sort of tiresome religious demagogues who adopt a strident view of their religion and then insist it’s the One True Way. Follow this amazing parody account instead.
Chris Brown
…aaaaaaaaand, as if on cue, Rolling Stone literally just published this news.
Morrissey
As with many of the people on this list, there’s a certain perverse fascination in seeing what Morrissey’s going to do next — which nationality he’s going to offend, which contemporary he’s gonna bitch about, which member of the Royal Family he’s going to wish fiery doom upon. But the older he gets, the more the Crazy Moz sideshow comes to overshadow the fact that once, at least, he was one of the world’s greatest and most idiosyncratic songwriters. Those days are long since gone, and if they’re ever gonna come back, it won’t be with the Morrissey traveling insult tent.
Ted Nugent
I mean, sure, at least “Cat Scratch Fever” was a good song, and there’s something perversely entertaining about Nugent’s lunacy — but really, the time for asking people who are clearly certifiable their opinions on matters of import is long since passed. Considering the lunatics are largely already running the asylum, let’s leave the ones that aren’t to their own devices.
Diplo
His social media presence is so consistently obnoxious that you’d be forgiven for thinking it was performance art some sort of ongoing experiment in being a terrible person, but nope, apparently that’s just how Diplo is. He can throw his phone in the air and catch it behind his back, too! One day we will all look back at this and shudder.
Alex Jones
And anyone else who has ever used terms like “false flag,” “chemtrails,” or “New World Order.” etc etc. These people are delusional. Stop giving their “theories” airtime. Seriously. Stop.