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25 of the Greatest Madonna-isms

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What do you give to the woman who has it all for her birthday? "Respect" was the best answer we came up with, which is why we’re honoring Madonna’s special day with some of her greatest quotes. The silver-tongued Queen of Pop kicked off the festivities on her Instagram (where she continues to remind us that it’s great not giving a shit) with a revealing photo from her early platinum blonde days. Always the provocateur, Madge’s most shocking moments often had little to do with what she was wearing (or not), but rather the things she said. Here are Madonna’s greatest Madonna-isms — utterances that only she could get away with.

“When I’m hungry, I eat. When I’m thirsty, I drink. When I feel like saying something, I say it.”

“People usually choose ‘truth’ when it’s their turn because you can tell a lie about yourself and no one will be the wiser, but when you are dared to do something, you have to actually do it. And doing something daring is a rather scary proposition for most people. Yet for some strange reason, it has become my raison d’être.”

“I am not surprised by my success because it feels natural.”

“I am my own experiment. I am my own work of art.”

“I’m a gay man trapped in a woman’s body!”

“I’m tough, I’m ambitious, and I know exactly what I want. If that makes me a bitch, okay.”

“I think that Kabbalah is very punk rock.”

“I want to be like Gandhi, and Martin Luther King, and John Lennon… but I want to stay alive.”

“A lot of people are afraid to say what they want. That’s why they don’t get what they want.”

Everybody loves you when they are about to cum.”

“I won’t be happy till I’m as famous as God.”

“I’ll flirt with anyone from garbagemen to grandmothers.”

“Listen, everyone is entitled to my opinion.”

“I’m anal retentive. I’m a workaholic. I have insomnia. And I’m a control freak. That’s why I’m not married. Who could stand me?”

“If at first you don’t succeed, you’re obviously not me.”

“I have the same goal I’ve had ever since I was a girl. I want to rule the world.”

“Sometimes you have to be a bitch to get things done.”

“I don’t trust any man who hasn’t kissed another man.”

“Crucifixes are sexy because there’s a naked man on them!”

“I’m attracted to obstacles I need to overcome. I’m interested in facing challenges, things that are going to be harder rather than easier.”

“I just can’t stand waiting. I always want everything right away. Nothing came as fast as I wanted it.”

“I do what I want. I’m the boss.”

“The best guy in the world is one who doesn’t feel threatened by an independent woman.”

“I have my work and my faith… If that’s boring to some people, I can’t tell you how much I don’t care.”

“If I can’t be daring in my work or the way I live my life, then I don’t really see the point of being on this planet.”