Noah’s telling me about some Don Draper realness, some 1st base sexual whatevering, and sure it’s hot but I’m so bored and then he goes home to his stupid family watching Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and then, finally, he gets to the point: I should pay attention to Oscar Hodges, the redhead who owns The Lobster Roll, where Alison works. Apparently there’s a history of lobster/fisherman wars between the Hodges and the Lockharts, so that means it’s one of that litter of hunky boys at the Lockhart ranch who died, or it’s Joshua Jackson. I’m not sure. They tell me nothing at the precinct. Noah’s squirming now. He needs to “go home to his wife.” Which wife, am I right?
Now in Alison’s world, things are slightly cheerier. She’s listening to Dolly Parton in the morning while Cole comes back from his shower. He rants about new construction and how summer people have no respect for property, beauty, and community, while shirtless. Alison’s en route to the hospital to get her nurse job back. Once she gets there, she freaks out when the doctor takes care of a woman and her young child with cancer.
After the hospital, she goes to the Montauk Lighthouse to do one of her secret rituals: cutting. Then she’s at The Lobster Roll, talking with ginger Oscar Hodges, the owner, about his plans for a bowling alley next door. She bikes to the Montauk Library and Noah’s there, ready to learn all about the ocean. They kiss, clandestinely. So they’re a couple now? I really don’t get the spark of the affair, here. Noah’s a creepy creep one week in Alison’s world and the next week he’s total secret boyfriend material. Theirs is not a love I am really rooting for in this case.
At least when Alison takes Noah to the docks, she gives him some real seaside realness: that fishing licenses have gone from 8000 fishermen to a couple of hundred, that commercial boats dragged nets across the bottom of the ocean and “raped” it. “The ocean is mean,” Alison says. She tells Noah that he has a fantasy (obviously) and then they make out.
The town meeting is pure Gilmore Girls kookiness, humble and true, with an Alec Baldwin being mad about something shoutout. Oscar gets up and presents his bowling alley idea, and that sets Cole off. He grandstands. He makes a speech. He was born here, his son is buried here, he will die here, because he loves foreshadowing. After the meeting, the Lockharts (one Lockhart doomed, likely) fight with Oscar. That night, Alison is asleep next to Cole. She’s awakened by a text from Noah. She texts back. Then she has great sex with Cole: “Don’t wake up,” she says.
These assholes are way too busy telling me about their parallel sex lives and their great affair to give me any clues as to why Cole Lockhart (likely), or maybe other Lockhart got hit by a car, murdered in broad day or nightlight, in ever-so-sleepy Montauk. I’ve got to solve this case, and I’ve got to do it quickly! What does it mean that they both had sleepy sex with their spouses? That they were thinking of other people? What is marriage? What is an affair? Tune in next week, for more coyness, and more ocean!