James Bond’s Newest Weapon May Be Jazz Hands

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Will the next James Bond be Idris Elba, Damien Lewis or Joel Grey? Will the next Bond girl be Léa Seydoux…or Bernadette Peters? But really. Imagine Bernadette Peters — or better yet, Carol Channing — singing Madonna’s “Die Another Day.” Such fantasies would have formerly been nonsensical (and sure, still are), but you’ll soon be able to add speculation on the casting of a musical theatre James Bond to the mix of already abundant cinematic Bond casting rumors.

Executive producer Merry Saltzman spoke to Playbill about having acquired the rights to a production of James Bond: The Musical for her company, Placeholder Productions. The musical’s book will be written by Dave Clarke, with music and lyrics by Jay Henry Weisz — all spawned from Ian Fleming’s 007 novels, of course. However, the musical’s storyline isn’t coming directly from any of the novels, though it’ll allegedly entail some evil from some of your favorite classic Bond evil-doers; they’re also making their “own Bond girl” for the stage production — I’m still keeping my fingers crossed for Peters or Channing. Saltzman said that the aim is for the musical to debut during the 2017-2018 season, either on Broadway or in Vegas, so prepare yourself for all the guns, glitter and villainous jazz hands.