If tech founders are the new rock stars — though let’s really, really hope they aren’t — then perhaps stoner kids who dream of starting a company that delivers weed via drones are the new teen-outcast metal bands. That is, at least, the conceit of an utterly wonderful parody of The Mountain Goats classic “The Best Ever Death Metal Band in Denton.”
Apparently based on last week’s Gizmodo piece of the same, Mountain Goats-riffing name, the song seems to have originated with Tumblr user quoms, who wrote several verses about Bitcoin cannabis drone heroes Jashwyn and Chaz (but, sadly, only recorded the first two). Their story begins:
The best-ever Bitcoin cannabis drone entrepreneurs in San Francisco Were a couple of guys who’d been friends since Montessori school. One was named Jashwyn, and the other was Chaz. They got 2 million dollars in seed funding.
The track has, of course, already made its way to prolific Tumblr-er John Darnielle, who writes, “It’s genius imo. I think it works especially well because the line-lengths are pretty forgiving in this song, you can pretty much do what you feel as long as you land on that iamb/trochee combo at the end of the first verse, though that’s not to sell the author’s work short here: this is tremendous.” (He does, however, suggest that “420, with drones!” would be a funnier construction than “420, but with drones!”)
Read the complete, laugh-out-loud funny “Best-Ever Bitcoin Cannabis Drone Entrepreneurs in San Francisco” at quoms’ Tumblr, where you can also listen to the all-too-brief recording — and rejoice in the fact that, along with all the many indignities the Internet has inflicted on us this week, it also managed to transform a jokey, Mountain Goats-inspired headline about tech bros into a thoroughly entertaining, almost-fully-realized parody of the song that title referenced.