Kristen Schaal Just Wants to Protect Boys From Leggings


Kristen Schaal made her return to a post-Jon Stewart Daily Show last night, appearing in a segment about the crisis affecting school children across America: a shortage of funding and qualified teachers leggings.

After debating with Trevor Noah on seniority, Schaal satirized the ongoing debate over school dress codes, which single out girls for wearing revealing clothing like yoga pants and leggings. Clips of news segments and talk show panels are shown, revealing how one-sided the debate is, framing dress codes as either a formality issue “preparing girls for the future” or a means of avoiding distraction for hormonal boys. “That really tugs at my heartstrings,” Schaal laments, “Even more than those leggings make those teenage boys want to tug at their dick-strings.”

After showing a Fox & Friends segment, where a panel of fathers (Andrew Sansone, Arthur Aidala, and Duck Dynasty’s Willie Robertson) weighed in on the debate before creepily judging three women wearing leggings, Schaal has an impromptu fashion show of appropriate leggings she has designed to protect men and kill their boners dead.

Watch the segment below:

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