Gird your loins, because tonight Game of Thrones returns to HBO for season six. There will be dragons. There will be sex. There will be Jon Snow — or maybe that’s just wishful thinking. After all the teasing by George R. R. Martin and the gang, we could all use a few drinks for tonight’s premiere. Get sauced and Thrones-y with Flavorwire’s official drinking game.
Take a drink whenever…
Jon Snow’s name is mentioned.
you crush on a Dothraki.
Jorah and Daario Naharis fight it out over Dany.
Tyrion gets drunk, because these people are insufferable.
Finish your drink if…
that creepy bitch Melisandre brings Jon Snow back to life.
Ian McShane’s character declares something about “tits and dragons.”
someone confuses Bran Stark with Harry Potter.
Jaime Lannister teams back up with Brienne of Tarth to slay and have more will-they-won’t-they sexual tension.
Petyr Baelish gets his after ratting on Cersei.
Do a shot if…
Jon Snow returns Bran Stark-style as a consciousness-shifting Warg and inhabits the body of his direwolf, Ghost — prompting the Internet to create a three direwolves moon tee in his honor.
Arya Stark engages some of that nightmare-inducing face-swapping mojo.
Cersei really resurrected her Frankenstein-ish monster The Mountain for red-hot sexy times and not white-hot revenge.
Tyrion imposes a free prostitution policy while in charge of Meereen during Dany’s absence.
The Hound returns after falling off a cliff and his already mangled face is worse for wear.
Finish the bottle if…
Jon Snow returns as one of those mf White Walkers and declares war — or if he’s actually dead (drink the entire liquor cabinet).
Arya Stark kicks all the asses, blind as a bat.
Daenerys gets eaten alive by dragons for her Mommie Dearest/dragons-in-chains antics.
Ramsay Bolton gets skinned alive, because damn he deserved it — but you didn’t really need to see that ish.
you actually remember the kid king’s name, because no one really cares about that guy.